Thursday, March 18, 2010

OK, I will short hand the update.

You know, after I wrote that last post it was about 5:50 in the afternoon, I went upstairs and laid down and did not get up until 6:00 the next morning.  And I only got up then to get the twins off to school.  I guess with all the energy I have been putting out since October has finally caught up with me.  Call it a delayed reaction...  Susilou made a comment that was very empathetic for what happened last time I posted.  It made me feel good – Thanx.

Here is a summary of much:
PPT – Although ignorance did raise it’s ugly head, I did win the first battle.  I will have my daughter evaluated at the deaf school.  The other battle I won was I wanted 6 areas to be evaluated, got that too!  Yeah for me.

They were to send the referral Tuesday.  I called today the school, they did not. I called the Guidance Counselor and said I wanted it faxed TODAY.  “Well, the person who was at your PPT isn’t in today and only the Head of the Dept. can do that.”  Guess what?  She was at the PPT as well.  “OK”.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t follow up and light a fire under them because  I had to substitute teach today for a half day in the next town, and then visit my Mom in the nursing home.  I also saw her yesterday.  She isn’t doing well.  You know it’s hard to ‘lose’ the person you once knew so well.  Her body is there but her mind has gone elsewhere.  With all this happening I had practically no time to see her for months.  I would like her back, for just a few moments, so she can meet her new grandchildren.  That would mean a lot to me.  I don’t think it will happen...  That makes me very sad.

Yesterday my deaf daughter woke up and her usual sparkly cheery face was dark and sad. I gave her some breakfast and asked her to change out of her p.j.’s.  It was a wile so I went up to her room and she was sitting on the floor in tears.  I sat down next to her, and asked her what was wrong, she just shook her head.  She doesn’t have the American signs, she doesn’t have English and I don’t think that she knows how to express her emotions. I asked does she miss her friends, China, her school, she continued to shake her head.  I got out the dictionary and looked up ‘lonely’ in Chinese.  I pointed t out, she nodded “Yes”, and her tears started really flowing.  She tried to hold back, I told her it was alright for her to cry, she shook her head “No”.  I told her , that it was my job as her Mommy to take care of her and it was OK.  Still shook her head “No”.  I decided to deal with the loneliness problem first, it was more important.  Now with my other daughter in school (and doing fine) she is home alone.  Even with all the girls home, the twins tend to play & talk together as does my older daughter and the new daughter. She is isolated.  So I cancelled my plans for the day, took her to meet my Mom..., then took her to Starbucks for a smoothie and scone, which she loved, and then to 3 towns over to have a ‘play date’ with one of my friend’s children.  She had met this friend when we had dinner with them one night, and they hit it off instantly.  And no her friend didn’t know sign, they were the same age and they just ”communicated”  So we got them together shortly after that.  She really needed to be with a kid her own age.  So I tried to make the day busy & meaningful for her.

Later, I sat my girls down and gave them a strong awareness lecture.  You girls cannot talk amongst yourselves and leave your sister out. I know you don’t know sign yet but you can give her an idea of what’s going on. She is your sister, we are family, we help each other. I understand this is a new concept for you all, but I do NOT want to see you leaving her out of the loop anymore. Play cards with her, learn sign with her from the book, draw with her, but don’t go into your rooms and close the door leaving her alone, that is unacceptable.  At the dinner table, you act as if she isn’t there.  How would you feel if you were treated that way?  Be aware, and include her.
I know I will have to keep reminding them until it becomes a habit.

My older daughter has settled in school.  After her first day I wrote to two teachers and left a message for her Guidance Counselor.  I wanted them to know that I was watching, AND I needed them to do tings a bit differently.

Did I mention that two of the bunnies were adopted?  The last two, the shelter will take on the 28th, because they are old enough to be fixed.

I met with a wonderful woman tonight about teaching my family sign.  She is deaf. Her fee is incredibly reasonable. The only problem is it would be times 7. So that won’t work.  I thought about it, because it has to start ASAP, so the family can communicate with their deaf sister/daughter.  I decided if I start with 3, my dh, and the two older girls, that would be the way to go.  Now I just need to get that money to start the lessons.  I explained the situation to her and said I would tell her when we could start as soon as we got the finances to do so.  She was very understanding.  Just a side note, when we talked on the phone, (through an interpreter) she said how will I recognize you?  I explained on occasion I am told I look like Meryl Streep.  And she said, oh, I’ve been told I look like Sally Fields.  And I said, great, we both can give out autographs. You know what?  She DID look like Sally Fields!

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