Monday, March 28, 2011

A short post because it is quite late but I feel guilty for not posting, so...I am.  I believe that most of my readers are female, but correct me if I am wrong.  Having said that I want to share with you on "What your Mother never told you about menopause."  I personally had never heard of any of these things until they snuck up on me and said, "Welcome."  For those of you that have not arrived at this glorious time of life yet, let me tell you what happens.  First for no apparent reason you start to gain weight even though nothing in your diet or exercise has changed.  And when you go to lose it, it is almost impossible to take off.  Then there are those waves of sheer exhaustion that come crashing down on you and you just have to lie down or you'll fall down.  Memory, forget it! Literally.  I used to be a Type A personality now I'm Type Z.  Things roll into one's brain and right out again.  It's ridiculous.  The most important and simplest things are forgotten.  And finally there are those 'down' periods that pull you in and sit on you.

I tell you it's not fair, especially when that 'M' word can stay for up to 10 years. I've had several serious talks with my body about it, but have gotten no where.  SO I say to you all Beware, it is just around the corner and it's not  pretty picture.

Monday, March 21, 2011

I sometimes move so slow.  I can't get up to speed and thinking of all that I need to get down just overwhelms me to a standstill.  I do not like that feeling.  There is a lot going on at the moment, and a lot of balls to juggle, but still I do want to keep order.

OK some updates:
My new daughter did start high school in Feb, after we won our case.  She LIKES it and is doing well.  I actually called a meeting of all her teachers, and you know what?  They all showed up and listened and responded.  I explained to them the differences of an immigrant child and an Internationally adopted child.  How they learn differently and the issues that are associated with them that effect their learning.  One point that I made that was very important was for them to realize just because her social and reading English is good, it still takes 5-7 years for cognitive , deductive reasoning and abstract thinking to be acquired.  I said that we were a team and any time that I could help at home with the work to let me know and visa versa.  Boy did that feel good after fighting the Middle School for so long.

My twins have excelled to the point that their teachers wrote a letter to the principal of the Middle School (yes the same) that they will be going to next year saying it would be a disservice to them not to take 7th grade English (ILA) (They will be in 6th grade) because at this time they are probably on an eighth grade level. If they were to be in 6th grade they would be bored. They will also be in 7th grade Spanish since their 5th grade didn't have languages offered, and they will be in honors math.  Right now they are in a school an International School that only goes to 5th grade.  With all that I had a meeting with the Principal, and she gave me an indication that she agreed it would be best to have the girls go up those levels.

My deaf daughter is wearing us down.  Her life skills and knowledge are on a 4 year old level and she constantly has to be watched and reprimanded.  She does so many things wrong I have felt like a bad Mom because it has been so hard to find any break in her behavior or choices that I can have a calm period with her. So I knew constantly disapproving what she does really does not help her or me.  I just couldn't figure out what to do because she can be so frustrating.  Finally I decided to read a book to her at bedtime.  We sit side by side on the bed with the pillow behind my back and she's curled up with her bears and I read the story.  That is my calm/connect moment with her.

My eldest is excited about entering high school especially because she got to choose her school.  She will be majoring in Japanese, the language, culture and literature.  In addition she will be doing all the other required high school courses.  She is beyond thrilled.

Me, I'm well, that's another story for another time, it's getting late.

Friday, March 18, 2011

A Connection

I am so excited by everyone welcoming back.  I was so sure you all would have given up on me by now.  I sure would have.

I took all five of my girls to my friend's farm and we sat on towels with binoculars and looked at the supermoon and the constellations.  It was so much fun.  Then the girls started playing moon tag because it was so bright out that we didn't need flashlights.

I had a very sweet moment with my deaf daughter tonight.  They don't come often, this may have been only the 3rd time since we brought her home.  And for the last several months she has been acting like a complete four year old who we needed to watch every moment.  Anyway, if you remember I mentioned that a while back she had told me that she had been adopted before by a Chinese man and woman when they had found her abandoned as a baby.  I am going to skip sideways for a moment to something that occurred two weeks ago.  It had been a disappointing day and I felt like I needed a hug.  So I went over to my deaf daughter and hugged her.  She asked me why I did that.  I said that I felt like I needed a hug.  She gave me the strangest look.  I asked, have you ever been hugged before?  She gave me a shake of her head with a disgusted look on her face.  I told her that I was going to teach her about hugs and what they were for.  She did not look happy.  Now back to tonight.  I went in to say goodnight to her, and knowing hugs are still taboo I just stroked her forehead.  She looked at me.  She said my Mother in China used to stroke my forehead to put me to sleep, and she showed me how she did it.  Then she described two siblings that were disabled in a way that made me guess CP, epilepsy, or some other muscular malfunction.  She said her Mom had to feed them, dress them and put them to bed,  I asked, how many were in her house.  She counted, Mother, Father, her, the two disabled children, two much older kids and a baby that had been abandoned that they adopted.  A total of eight. I wish I could find this family but she does not know the name of the village.

But from tonight, I have learned a way into her heart, which I had never been able to find before.  I now know  that I can stroke her forehead to connect with her on a Mother/daughter level.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

I'm baaaack!

I start again.  Today is St. Patrick's Day.  And many years ago when my twins were little someone told them that if they put their shoe out a leprechaun will put a treat in it.  I thought that was cute, so I did it.  Little did I realize that by doing that I had started a tradition that I have to do for the next 20 years or so.  When my oldest daughter came, then I had to do one for her.  Now my two new daughters need to be included.  That's five shoes and five treats.  Now you think that shouldn't be that hard.  The fact is I never remember to do it until the morning of when THEY remember to put their shoes out.  SO I have to run around trying to find green treats.  Today I had to go to five stores until I found five freshly baked mud pies with green mint cream in the middle! And I had to hurry to figure out how to put them in the shoes before the first daughter came home. So I got some green tissue paper those gold doily thingies and put the pies on a gold doily and then green paper and into the shoe.  Well, the screams of delight as each one came home was wonderful.  And I heaved a sigh of relief and swore to my self that I WILL remember next year before the day..

Tonight, the twins, age 10, helped my deaf daughter with all her homework.  It was so cute to watch.  They were so patient, and my deaf daughter didn't become frustrated at all even when she couldn't get the answers.

I will catch everyone up on the news, but I will do small posts each time so it isn't so daunting.

I will also post more pictures.  Bye for now to anyone who has stuck around...